10 tips to make motherhood easier

Having raised four kids, our founder Anna van den Bogert shares her advice on making motherhood easier.

1. Always remember that you and only you know what’s best for you and your baby
Learn to tune into your emotions and listen to what feels good for you. Emotions provide essential information about yourself and should be celebrated more. We are prone to suppress them, but they offer a way to get closer to yourself. When they are pushed away, you’ll grow more and more distant from yourself. If you feel what you feel and learn to talk about your emotions, you’ll get closer to yourself and achieve natural flow.

2. The only thing required to bond with your baby is you and your baby. It’s that simple
Don’t be fooled into thinking you need technology or artificial inventions to form the bond between you and your child.

3. You don’t always have to solve everything for your baby, as long as you are simply there
Remember that feelings of despair or frustration are also what drives you to take such good care of your baby.

4. Sometimes, don’t be afraid to put your own needs before your child’s
To be able to take care of your baby, don’t be ashamed to first take care of yourself. If taking a shower in the morning is important to you, go ahead and do it, even though your baby is crying. Taking care of your own needs first may seem to be at the expense of your baby, but in the long term I believe it’s beneficial for them to learn that you’re not always servicing them and that you take your own needs seriously. Balance is key!

5. To facilitate bonding with your child, don’t look at the clock
Especially in the first six months, feeding your baby on request and letting your baby sleep on request instead of looking at the clock will make you and your baby find your own unique rhythm.

6. What works, works
Don’t be afraid to break ‘the rules’ if your intuition tells you otherwise. Why do we put all these motherhood matters outside of ourselves? You get to decide what’s good for you and your baby.

7. If you want to be intimate with your partner, don’t feel bad about it
Don’t forget about nurturing the relationship with your partner.

8. Allow friends and family to help taking care of your child and feel less isolated
We’re all going through the same. You don’t have to do everything by yourself. Learn to ask for help. We’ve all become so isolated in motherhood, but I’ve experienced such relief when the burden of childcare is shared. It takes a village to raise a child. Build a village.

9. You don’t need to always entertain your child. It’s completely ok to not enjoy the playground, or jigsaw puzzles
Keep your energy up by being present but not constantly servicing your child. Children learn by imitating, not by being entertained.

10. Parenting is calculated risk-taking. Sometimes they fall, that’s how they learn
Learning to avoid all risks won’t help them discover their boundaries. We are all here to grow, experience and learn. Risk-taking is an essential part of that, because only then do children learn their boundaries. However scary it may seem, if you always hold their hand, they won’t learn to their best ability.